Saturday, November 15, 2008

Last day of school and thoughts on friendship

Last day of school yesterday! But I suspect my nightmare is just about to start. My two kids were not home together for 5 minutes before they'd already started to bicker.

I stuck an imaginary microphone at Lesley-Anne and asked, "So how do you feel about your school year?"

Lesley-Anne: "It was fun! The most fun year I've had, I think. My p5 class is very lively and we all had such a great time together."

I asked Andre the same question, "So how was your school year?"

Andre: "Good."

Me: "That's it?"

Andre (thinking): "Very good."

I had spoken to Paul's (Andre's good friend) mother just a couple of days back and she told me that many of the boys in their class were in an uproar because they didn't get into the same p3 class as their friends. (At their school, the kids are streamed at the end of p2 according to their results). The group of boys that Andre hangs out with will be completely split up. One of them was so upset despite having gotten into the best class because none of his friends did. He protested by refusing to go to school the next day (see what happens when you're smarter than all your pals!!) Paul's mum told me Paul was upset that he wouldn't be in the same class as Andre.

When I mentioned this to Andre, he said nonchalantly, "Tell Paul (me? Tell Paul??) that I will meet him at the same place at recess and we can play badminton." I asked him whether he was disappointed that they wouldn't be in the same class. He replied, "yes." Pause. "But maybe when we go to p3, we will make new friends and forget our p2 ones."

Wah. Very insightful but I never took Andre to be so pragmatic and unsentimental. Not sure if it's due to his live-for-the-day attitude, and not sure I like it. Sometimes out of the blue, he comes up with these views that belie his innocence. Just the other day, I overheard Lesley-Anne complaining that our maid didn't cook her macaroni the way she liked it. Andre piped up, "Don't be like that, che che. Everybody makes mistakes." Nothing you can say to that!

Anyway, back to the friends issue, I think Paul has been a great friend to Andre. Andre had recounted how he was being called names by one of his classmates and Paul was there to comfort him. More than once, these two have stuck together so I will try to encourage the friendship as long as I possibly can.


Anonymous said...

My kid's best friend gave her a Christmas gift on the last day of school as they were parting ways for new school next year. I "smsed" the mom to thank her and asked why such an early gift cos they would see each other again during Chinese class and holiday meetups. Her mom told me her kid was feeling sentimental about the departure. On the other hand, my girl was still having great plans about what she could do about keeping up with the friendship and had no signs of moodiness. Same event but both looked upon it so differently...
Her best friend is the artistic and thoughtful child who exhibits alot of sensibility. My girl is still like a baby.... *sigh*


monlim said...

QX: I think there are lots of advantages about your girl and Andre being so innocent, at least they don't agonise over life issues! Probably part of their happy-go-lucky attitude, I actually envy that :)

Anonymous said...

Mon: You are so right about this happy-go-lucky attitude. She has a competitive class of kids with her...and all must attain full marks in dictation all the time otherwise you would see frowns on their faces. For her, she made one careless mistake and when I asked her how she felt that everyone scored full marks except her. You know her reply? "Mummy, I have all correct answers except for 1, isn't that good?" Then off she went to play with her friends. On one hand, I was happy for her that she took it so cooly....on the other, I hope she learned that she had to be more careful next time. Her teacher was waving and doing thumbs up action frantically to me behind her that she thought it was a great response. I supposed to stop me in case I went on to scold her. LOLL. I reckon if they can strike the right balance, this is definitely a feature to have to keep one's sanity in check for the many adversities in the life journey. :)


monlim said...

I LOVE your daughter's response! I think that's a healthy attitude to life. It may not win her the full marks in the short term but you know what? Life is a long journey - by the time all her perfectionist friends have ulcers, she'll still be living a happy life :D

Anonymous said...

Thanks Mon for the reminder. :D You know something... when I read about the things you wrote about Andre, I found him so cute and adorable even somewhat smart. However, when I saw similar things my girl did, I found her nonsensical. Am I being harsh as a parent sometimes I wonder.

I am now reading this book "The 10 important things you can do for your children" by Roni Jay and I am only at chapter 4. But I just want to share that chapter 2 makes an impact on me "Give them some magic". I feel that reading these books is like reading your blog...need to be reminded at times. A lot of things are common sense but we tend to forget and yet we often wonder why our kids are so forgetful with our words?? A wake-up call for me. :D


monlim said...

QX: I know what you mean! Everyone says Andre is cute but sometimes I think he's so immature. I guess we have different standards for our kids vs other people's kids.

We need to keep reminding each other our kids are gifts, I know when they're all grown up, I will so miss this stage of their lives!

Anonymous said...

Mon: Yes lovely gifts from God. Certainly these are precious moments we will miss because they say the darnest things at this age... freely and not self-consciously. And sometimes with a sense of humour that I cannot take the example below..

Because of this same nature, I am sometimes skeptical what she tells me about homework is correct. Recently she came back with 2 lines in her homework book but she claimed that everyone else had to do both the homework except for her, only one. Initially she was telling me in a joking fashion plus it did not sound logical to me, so I really could not take her seriously and had to call the teacher to clarify. Now only to find out from the teacher that everything she said was correct. That made me look like a super "gan cheong" mom who did not trust her kid!! I could hear the teacher chuckling on the other side of the phone. arrrrggghh.

PS: Enjoy your holiday! I look forward to mine too...but much later.

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