Play at your own Risk!

Risk - a game of world conquest, the ultimate test of military strategic prowess. Or so claims Parker Brothers.

Last night, we brought out our old game that had been languishing in the storeroom and introduced it to the kids for the first time. We thought we might need to give chance a bit, since the kids were greenhorns. Never happened - we were too busy trying to save our own skins.

Kenneth, the old pro at Risk, was the first to succumb, so malu. Next, Lesley-Anne fought valiantly over war-torn Asia but in vain. Kenneth tried to advise Andre to fortify his troops instead of battling down to his last man, but the advice fell on deaf ears - Andre was on a crazed rampage for world domination and no one, least of all his daddy, was going to stop him. Every country conquered was greeted with an evil cackle worthy of Hannibal Lector.

Africa, Europe, South America - one by one the continents fell like dominoes to the 8-year-old dictator. Finally, I was the last bastian of freedom, desperately defending North America but to no avail as bloodthirsty Napolean steamrolled over me with an uncanny, unrelenting stream of sixes on the dice. White flag.

Strategy, my foot. Plan all you want - it boils down to pure, dumb luck which Andre always seems to have an abundant supply of. "This is FUN!" he declared gleefully. I'm sure Hitler thought so too.