Making memories

It's already August and I wonder how more than half the year could have flown by without my realising it. Didn't we just celebrate Christmas not too long ago? I'm constantly reminded of how fast kids grow up, especially when I think about how I was so stressed out over Lesley-Anne's PSLE last year, and now, she's almost three-quarters through secondary 1.

This year, I've been more convinced than ever that we need to consciously make memories of our time with our children. What I mean is that often, we're so caught up with the hustle and bustle of life that we don't stop to punctuate it with something out of the ordinary.

When your kids become adults and look back at their childhood, what will they remember? I shudder when I hear of people who say they associate their childhood with dreary mugging and a series of exams. What a sad way to remember your youth!

I think part of the reason for this is that we don't create enough "moments" for our kids. What are moments? To me, they're like mental snapshots of the interesting bits of our lives. Going on holiday is usually a moment, a big one. These episodes, especially since they tend to be documented by lots of pictures, are what will make an impression or a memory.

However, holidays are usually occasional events, unless you're exceptionally well-off. The rest of the 350 odd days of the year when you're not on holiday tends to be unmemorable. When your kids are not doing homework, studying or busy with some CCA or other, chances are they're just in their rooms, reading or playing with their toys until the grind starts again. Not that there's anything wrong with reading or playing but it can get rather routine, forgettable and even aimless.

Sometime this year, I instituted a movie night on weekends. I just thought it would be nice to break the monotony and plan an event where the whole family could enjoy together. We'd fix a day and time, usually Saturday evening, pick a movie and gather some snacks (of course!)

Honestly, it turned out even better than I expected. It became a treat that the kids looked forward to during the weekend and it motivated them to finish their work faster. After that first movie night, Andre told me he'd had the "best weekend ever". It was so fun that I introduced another event - card night - where we'd play gin rummy (it's not gambling if no money is involved!) Some families prefer to go out but we're homebodies at heart so these activities work for us - they're simple, convenient and don't cost anything.

When my kids look back as adults, I want their childhood memories to be imprinted with our family table tennis and badminton games, movie nights, and bucketloads of laughter. It's brain-washing of sorts, but the good kind.