'Tis the season to be jolly

Taking a short break from travel blogging to write a post on my favourite season - Christmas!

In our household, the Christmas feeling begins when we take out the Christmas tree and trappings from the storeroom. This ritual has become something of a tradition and an event that Lesley-Anne and Andre look forward to every year.

The first sight of the decorations is always an exciting reminder of the season (for me, it's a reminder of how quickly the year has flown by!)

Christmas music sets the ambience, the tree is carefully erected, the lights draped on, then negotiations ensue as to which decorations should be used and where each should go. Even hanging decorations has to be a fair process, which each kid given an equal number.

(Wearing the Santa hat was Andre's idea, I guess it puts him in the mood!)

Then the other accessories come out of storage, like these Christmas toys (below). They only emerge once a year which make them seem especially precious.

Also these reindeer candle holders, in danger of rusting but carry much sentimental value.

Finally, here's the tree.

If you don't have a special Christmas tradition, I highly recommend starting one - it's very memorable for the whole family and something that I'm sure your kids will look back with much fondness.

And now the celebrations can start!

The hazards of being an IA

I'm baaaaaack.

You would've thought that after 7 days of holiday in a terrific city, I would be all relaxed and zen but nooo... today, I'm a ball of tension - it feels exactly like BEFORE I left for the holiday. Why? Let's see...

I happily thought I could blog while on holiday since I would be staying with my cousin and she has a computer. But as petit fleur pointed out, I couldn't blog in Beijing cos the authorities there block certain blogspot accounts. Apparently it's not all accounts, and the blocking is random, doesn't matter whether you're blogging on something as innocuous as fishing. So there I was with all these great photos and memories still fresh from each day of adventure and unable to share it. I couldn't even log in to publish the comments, for Pete's sake. I thought of posting a comment on Lilian's blog and would you believe it, I couldn't even access her blog to read it! I couldn't go into Facebook either, I felt completely cut off from the world.

We touched down late last night and the first thing I did on waking up this morning (even before breakfast), was to turn on my computer. Or at least, try to turn on my computer. IT WOULDN'T TURN ON. It seems that one week of neglect was just too much - it died sad and alone. I realised right then and there that the joke I made about how a bunch of us (with Lilian as president) should form the IAA (Internet Addicts Anonymous) was not really a joke. Cold sweat, curses, short of hallucination, I could've sworn I was going through withdrawal.

How am I posting this, then? Well, thank God we have a spare laptop that Lesley-Anne uses - she's not getting to use this today, I'm commandeering it until the IT service guy comes this afternoon to see if he can revive my baby. I'm praying the miracle happens - me and my Compaq have had many precious years together (plus too much un-backed up information).

So I will still post on my travel blog as promised, but delayed. I just hope it will be via my baby and not the substitute.

Beijing, here we come!

I haven't been blogging because it's been a mad rush trying to settle all my work before we leave for Beijing. There is also that business of packing - this will be the first time the kids are experiencing winter in any part of the world, so we've been trying to get all the warm stuff together. I hope the smog won't be too bad.

Beijing will be an interesting experience as this is the first trip we're taking with the kids that's not to a destination with theme parks or lots of kid-friendly places. It's going to be primarily culture - thousands of years old. I'm curious to see how my kids will react. Will they be enriched? Or will they be bored out of their minds after the first day? Already, Andre has expressed interest in climbing the Great Wall only so that he can take the ride back down!

The next time you hear from me may be from Beijing, if I can get internet access. I will try to blog from there, but if so, it will be on my travel blog, so do keep checking in there, ok?

Happy holidays and you'll hear from me real soon!

The tricky business of unconditional love

Since it's Sunday, here's a little soul food for thought.

Last Sunday at church, the pastor gave a particularly thought-provoking sermon which I felt had a worthy lesson for parents. He was explaining how as Christians, we all know intellectually that God loves us despite our sins. Yet, we often feel that He somehow loves us less if we do something wrong. Does this speak to you? I know I feel that way sometimes. Eg. if I miss my quiet time, I feel guilty because I think that God disapproves and He probably loves the other more devoted person more.

This stems very much from our own relationship with our parents, and more importantly, mirrors our children's relationship with us. Although our love for our kids is unconditional (as with God's love for us), our kids haven't necessarily internalised it. And can you blame them? We only praise them when they do good things or get good grades. When they do something not to our satisfaction, they are scolded or punished. I think that's why so many kids get caught up with chasing achievements because they think that will earn them their parents' affection.

It's a sobering thought - that our kids do not know (or believe) that we love them no matter what.

In case you're thinking, "but if I don't scold them, they will keep making mistakes and stop trying hard!" I think it's ok to correct but be careful that it's not perceived by our children as a withdrawl of love. Again using the parallel of God's relationship with us, as the pastor put it, God's love is like a safety net. Once we are secure in the fact that God loves us (and blesses us) regardless of what we do, we will no longer have performance anxiety. Instead, we will strive to do good because we are grateful for His grace and we want to love Him in return. We won't feel guilty because mistakes are ok - they don't deprive us of His love.

Likewise, if our children are assured of our unconditional love, I believe it will motivate them to do good and work hard, because they will want to please us, not because they are afraid of displeasing us. Get the difference? In this manner, they will also be more willing to try, to make mistakes because the degree of our love and approval is not dependent on them being perfect.

"But where sin increased, grace increased all the
more." - Romans 5:20

Last day of school and thoughts on friendship

Last day of school yesterday! But I suspect my nightmare is just about to start. My two kids were not home together for 5 minutes before they'd already started to bicker.

I stuck an imaginary microphone at Lesley-Anne and asked, "So how do you feel about your school year?"

Lesley-Anne: "It was fun! The most fun year I've had, I think. My p5 class is very lively and we all had such a great time together."

I asked Andre the same question, "So how was your school year?"

Andre: "Good."

Me: "That's it?"

Andre (thinking): "Very good."

I had spoken to Paul's (Andre's good friend) mother just a couple of days back and she told me that many of the boys in their class were in an uproar because they didn't get into the same p3 class as their friends. (At their school, the kids are streamed at the end of p2 according to their results). The group of boys that Andre hangs out with will be completely split up. One of them was so upset despite having gotten into the best class because none of his friends did. He protested by refusing to go to school the next day (see what happens when you're smarter than all your pals!!) Paul's mum told me Paul was upset that he wouldn't be in the same class as Andre.

When I mentioned this to Andre, he said nonchalantly, "Tell Paul (me? Tell Paul??) that I will meet him at the same place at recess and we can play badminton." I asked him whether he was disappointed that they wouldn't be in the same class. He replied, "yes." Pause. "But maybe when we go to p3, we will make new friends and forget our p2 ones."

Wah. Very insightful but I never took Andre to be so pragmatic and unsentimental. Not sure if it's due to his live-for-the-day attitude, and not sure I like it. Sometimes out of the blue, he comes up with these views that belie his innocence. Just the other day, I overheard Lesley-Anne complaining that our maid didn't cook her macaroni the way she liked it. Andre piped up, "Don't be like that, che che. Everybody makes mistakes." Nothing you can say to that!

Anyway, back to the friends issue, I think Paul has been a great friend to Andre. Andre had recounted how he was being called names by one of his classmates and Paul was there to comfort him. More than once, these two have stuck together so I will try to encourage the friendship as long as I possibly can.

Fun countdown to Christmas - an Advent calendar

The Advent season is drawing near, so I want to share something nice you can do for your kids - an Advent calendar.

An Advent calendar is a calendar which counts down to Christmas from 1 December. If you see the one in stores, it normally has 24 windows taped shut. Each day starting 1 December, you open one window, the last one you open on Christmas eve. Behind each window is an image of either the Nativity story or something related to Christmas. Some others have a piece of chocolate or candy behind each window.

I came across this idea of making an Advent calendar when I saw it in a kids' activity book. Lesley-Anne was in p1 then. I thought it would be a great way to build up the excitement, as well as make the wait for Christmas more bearable (kids always feel that Christmas will never come!) But I didn't like the thought of just putting pictures or candy behind the windows - what's so interesting about that?

So Lesley-Anne and I made an Advent calendar with 24 pockets - she decorated the pockets with stickers (right pic, it's very beat up I know, it's 4 years old!) I created 24 little rhymes - each night when she was sleeping, I would creep into her bedroom and slip one into the appropriate pocket for her to find in the morning. (Andre was only 4 then, so the Advent calendar was primarily for her.)

It gave her something to look forward to everyday - each rhyme described a word, and she had to solve it. When she had finished opening all 24 rhymes, the starting letter of each word in that order would form a sentence related to Christmas.

Here's the first one I did for Lesley-Anne. She was only 7 then, so the rhymes are pretty simple. I'm happy to share this and you're welcome to copy the rhymes if you like (but of course change the ones that don't apply to you!) The part in purple is the answer to the rhyme, so when you print out the rhyme, don't print that part. The final sentence spells out "Christmas means love and joy".

1. C is for Candy Cane

Red and white
Sticky and sweet
Plenty at Christmas
What a treat!

2. H is for Hope

A toy, a book, a bike
All children are alike
Hope for presents galore
What do you hope for?

3. R is for Reindeer

Dashing in the night
With Rudolf’s nose so bright
Delivering lots of toys
For all little girls and boys

4. I is for Ice

The Eskimos build igloos
Made completely out of ice
They’re freezing all year round
Which isn’t very nice

5. S is for Story

We tell this every night
Of three bears and three pigs
Why not have some new ones
For 2005 and 6?

6. T is for Tree

Tall and majestic
Green or white
Pretty and dressed up
In tinsel and light

7. M is for Mummy

She’s not very good at sports
She really can’t cook too
She is a terrible driver
But she’s great at loving you!

8. A is for Advent

A calendar like this one
Makes December really fun
Starting out each day
In a very special way

9. S is for Snow

Something in Singapore
We have not got
I wish it’ll snow some
Then it wouldn’t be so hot!

10. M is for Manger

Born in one
God’s only Son
On a bed of hay
Little Jesus lay

11. E is for Eternity

It’s a really long time
It means forever and ever
Sometimes it seems like
Christmas comes never!

12. A is for Angel

They live up high in heaven
Watching us from above
Sent to us by God
To show us care and love

13. N is for Noah

When the flood came
Everyone ran helter skelter
Except his family and animals
Who had the perfect shelter

14. S is for Stocking

It’s what Santa uses
To stuff his presents in
But since it’s very narrow
You may only get a pin!

15. L is for Lesley-Anne

Pretty, smart and sweet
An example to the rest
God made you with love
You are truly blessed

16. O is for Obey

Do what God asks
Do what your parents ask
With respect and love
No matter the task

17. V is for Vacation

Six weeks you’ve had
They’ve flown by very fast
But indeed I truly hope
Your holiday was a blast!

18. E is for Evangelise

Learn a new word today
It’s really good for you
It means tell others about God
Which is a great thing to do

19. A is for Andre

I know you don’t like
A pesky little brother
But later on in life
You’ll want no other

20. N is for New Year

In a few days more
It’s goodbye to 2004
I hope you had your fun
And enjoyed Primary 1

21. D is for Daddy

Sometimes he’s smiley
Sometimes he’s not
But whether he is or isn’t
He sure loves you a lot

22. J is for Jesus

Born in a manger
Though he knew the danger
He is the reason
We celebrate this season

23. O is for Overeat

The danger of Christmas
Is everything looks so yummy
First we stuff the turkey
Then we stuff our tummy!

24. Y is for You

Someone special
Someone unique
Tomorrow is Christmas
Let’s get to bed quick!

GEP service learning

Lesley-Anne brought home her service learning file so I thought I'd write a post on what she'd done during the year. Service learning is their form of community service. This year, they had to mentor p2 kids who were weak in English. As part of service learning, the p5 GEP had to create their own lesson plans and materials for the sessions, in teams of two. They met up with their p2 buddies for an hour every week for a term. For the first week, the teams used the materials they developed, then for subsequent sessions, they swapped materials with other teams.

This was the lesson plan Lesley-Anne's team came up with:

Trigger/Introduction
Show the children the picture and tell them to talk about it (like in oral). If they can't, show them examples and then, let them try again. Also, encourage them to use adjectives to describe things. This is to help prepare them for the composition they are going to write on the picture.

Development/An English Game
Instructions: Each player will be given a set of cards and a picture. On each card is a sentence. The sentence describes the picture. The cards are all jumbled up. The players must rearrange the cards to form a coherent composition based on the picture. The first player to rearrange the sentences into a coherent composition will win.

Reward: Winning person get chicken crackers while losing person gets two sweets.













Closure
Give them the composition template with the same picture (as introduction) and tell them to write a composition. Tell them to use adjectives like they did in the introduction to improve their story. When they are done, go through their mistakes with them and tell them how to improve on them. (Covers grammar, punctuation, spelling and tenses).

Objectives
At the end of the lesson, pupils should be able to write a four to six sentence essay and to sequence and organize sentences.

It's not the most sophisticated lesson plan but I think it's great to get older kids to help younger ones. Kids tend to relate better to each other and understand where the possible stumbling blocks might be. (Too bad Lesley-Anne won't mentor her own brother!) According to Lesley-Anne, they make their buddies take a simple English test during the first session and at the last session of the term. All of them had scored significantly higher in the second test, which I took to mean that they had benefited from the mentoring sessions.

For the GEP kids, I feel it gives them perspective to help kids who might not be as mentally agile as they are, to shift the focus from themselves and onto others.

Thinking (and fun) games for kids

Since the school holidays are approaching, I'll be writing more about leisure activities and less on school work (I'll probably have plenty to post about those during term time!) Today, I want to recommend some fun games for kids, in case you're wondering what they can do during the long vacation without having their brain completely disintegrate by the time school re-opens.

This game is not very new - it's been on the market for a while, but I think it's worth highlighting because of its entertainment and educational value. It's called Rush Hour by Thinkfun. Its objective is simple - basically, get the red car out of the gridlock using problem-solving and sequential-thinking skills (now you know why I like it! Yet another puzzle!) You set up the traffic as provided on a card and try to slide the vehicles around until you can get the red car out.

This game has won a whole string of awards - it's ingenious because it's visually interesting and easy to play, yet it makes you think. A set comes with a deck of 40 cards in increasing difficulty. Rush Hour is so popular that the makers created refill cards that you can buy if you finish the original 40. You can play all 40 of the original cards online, but I do recommend you buy the actual game because it's just more fun to physically move the cars around. Plus you don't really want your kids glued to the computer any more than they already are, right? It comes in a handy box that can be easily packed away and it can be played alone (great when you need your kid to entertain himself for a bit!)

Thinkfun has created some really intelligent games for kids that are simply terrific. We've since bought some others, including River Crossing (left) and Tipover (right). You can find them at any department store.













But my kids' (and my) favourite is still Rush Hour. The original and the best!

Pets for children? Start small

One of Lesley-Anne's long time ambitions is to be a vet because she adores animals. So naturally, the subject of pets came up. Both Kenneth and I are animal lovers, but we are also very pragmatic, forward-thinking parents. We've heard too many stories of how kids pester their parents for a dog or a cat, then once the fun wanes, it's the parent who has to bring the dog out for a walk, clean the poo, etc etc.

We resisted for a long time, but we also know that owning a pet instils a sense of responsibility, so we were two-minds about it. I had a mental list of disadvantages in my head: Dog - must walk, must clean poo, can be noisy, can be smelly. Cat - will drop fur, will scratch furniture, maybe will scratch children. Both - expensive. So we were at a stalemate... until a friend of mine offered me two hamsters. The story was that someone had given his kids two hamsters, but he had also just purchased a dog so the kids were now no longer interested in the hamsters. (In pet hierarchy, generally the bigger the pet, the higher the priority).

Well, since he was offering me free pets with free cage and trappings, I thought, why not? Hamsters would be easy pets to start with. We brought them home, the kids named them Hammie and Hyper. These are dwarf Winter White hamsters, very pretty. Lesley-Anne chose Hyper (and named her so) because when we were at my friend's place, that hamster kept running on the wheel at top speed, so she thought she'd like the active one.

Little did we know that Hyper was active because she was trying to escape from Hammie who was quite the queen tyrant! This one was a real spitfire alright - for the first few months, no one dared to take her out of her cage because she would hiss like a cat and bite any hand that wandered into the cage - vicious enough to draw blood. I would curse and swear everything I had to take her out to clean the cage. In fact, she attacked Hyper so badly that we had to separate the two eventually. Kenneth found another friend whose kid's pet hamster had just died and we took over the cage. (Look hard enough, you'll always find abandoned pet homes because pets die or kids lose interest!)

Hammie and Hyper are a great source of amusement to the family. If you think hamsters are not real pets, think again. They have their own personalities like all other pets. If you've watched Ratatouille, then you'll understand when I say that Hammie is exactly like Remy (the chef) and Hyper like Emile (the brother). Hammie (left pic) is super active, picky about food and now that we've tamed her, very affectionate. She's great fun to play with and will even lick my hand and let me rub her belly. Hyper turned out to be the antithesis of her name. She is fat, lazy... and fat. Her sole interest in life is eating. Ever since she's been released from the torture chamber with Hammie, her life consists of eating and sleeping. Sometimes, she even sleeps in the food bowl, probably to save herself the trouble of waddling to her munchies.

It's been over a year, the two hamsters are living the good life, though probably not for long as the life span of hamsters is only up to two years. Lesley-Anne is quite good about looking after the hamsters, which convinced me that her love of animals is not a passing phase. However, we've long delegated the washing of the cages to the maid (any surprise?)

Hamsters are great starter pets because they're very low maintenance. Fill up their food and water, clean the cage once a week and they're happy. If you use recycled paper pellets as bedding, you hardly get any smell. We've even left them unguarded in the house when we went to Hong Kong for 4 days, they were still happy and alive when we got back. In fact, we enjoy the hamsters so much that I suspect when they go on to Hamster Heaven, we might not move on to a cat or a dog, we'll just get more hamsters.

Watch out, black cat on the loose!

Over the weekend, Lesley-Anne was invited to a friend's birthday party. It was a theme party, so the guests were asked to dress up in costume. But since the guests were all self-conscious 11-year-olds, it must have been quite a task trying to find outfits that were "costume-y" enough without being too attention-seeking.

I brain-stormed quite a few with Lesley-Anne before she finally agreed on one which wasn't too "embarrassing". Eunice, I'll confess right now, I borrowed the idea from the Garfield costume you made for Sean!

It was very simple to make. A regular black t-shirt and bicycle shorts, a mask copied from the internet and painted black, two cardboard ears stuck onto a black hairband, and a bag strap as a tail.

Tah-dah - Catwoman! I told her not to cross anyone at the party or they'll all end up with seven years of bad luck, hehe.